No, it is not supposed to be rhyme-y. My creativity is just at an all time low.
Going to the gym everyday reminds me of a time when I was in MUCH better shape...and I love that I am getting back there. I used to run and enjoy it, I used to be "fit." No, I know I am not fat. Yes, I know my body HAS fat (more than it should right now...but hey....whatever) I'd like to take this time to thank my tummy. It has stayed relatively beautiful these past few years, thanks much to my eating. But now that I work out here, and I am not vegan, I get in better shape much quicker. The not so healthy eating of course makes for sugar crashes and bad cravings, but I have animal protein from the dairy and other foods (no, not meat, shut up, thanks) so muscles are building up quicker. When I am vegan, I stay healthy and in shape, but I have no muscles. It makes working out harder, but less necessary. But going to the gym and being active is healthy and definitely something I've missed. I was SO lazy the last year and a half of my life, it's gross. But I love my tummy...80% of the time. 20% of the time I eat too much and regret it, but my tummy always finds it's way back....hahah I love my metabolism <3 but hate my thighs...we can't have it ALL.
Why I just decided to post about my body... I do not know. I could overshare with you right now, but I choose not to. I just think people should be more positive about their image. Is my body perfect? Not by ANY means. It could be much improved, but for right now, it works. I plan that when I go back to New York, I focus evenn more on the fitness I have been lacking the past two years. I think about last summer and trying to get back into running...it was pathetic. I was SO lazy. When you are active, you feel good, about yourself and just in general. I just typed that after eating three mini chocolate bars ( I still hate candy here, it is awful) and I don't feel guilty...they are not NEARLY as unhealthy as things in the USA can be...
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I have been here now for two and a half months!! I feel like it has been much longer, and that is inboth good and bad ways. I do miss working, and school, and my best friends, and volunteering as well. Volunteering has ALWAYS been a huge part of my life. I grew up with little, but found no problem helping others in my situation and there are always people worse off that need things more. Here, I vowed never to let myself "get used" to seeing the poverty here. It is heartbreaking, even still. I hate that now it is less of a shock to me, but it nonetheless makes me want to help more....and branch out in doing so.
I remember talking to a friend of mine a while ago...he used to live in India, so he knows a lot about how the situations can be. The United States is a "1st World" country. Yes, there is poverty. There are people without jobs and without homes. Some can't eat every meal or afford luxuries. But there is no way you can ever complain about any of that after seeing this. I was never rich, I do not know what that feels like. But I have grown up and lived in a relatively well-to-do area for ever. Majority of residents upper-middle class. Most live in homes that here, would seem to be a mansion. Some complain there is nothing to do. They never look. I like to call Clifton Park "fat man's paradise" because if you like to eat...well....it is heaven. But honestly, there is so much to do within 20 minutes of the city.
I have such a dislike for people...back there. Too many deserve nothing, do nothing, and are handed....everything. Parents will buy their children cars, video games, clothes. No. I always saved up for what wanted. I don't remember the last time my parents bought me clothes, and I supply my vegan self with most of my food. I have to pay for a car, and college. I worked two jobs and volunteer, while graduating early. I also paid for this trip. No, I am not trying to look better...I just get frustrated at ignorance (PLUS I love being busy, all the time...hahah). I of course, in this time, forgot how to breathe and take a minute for myself. But after seeing poverty like this, hearing people being petty over facebook makes me ill.
Two days until my birthday. You know what I want? For you to go do something productive for another person. No, your job doesn't count. You get paid for it. Even if it is something small....donate money or your time, SOMETHING. And you will most likely be reading from me tomorrow :)
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ALSO....I am currently in the market for a new favorite color....pink just doesn't do it for me anymore. Any suggestions?? :P
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