It hurts a little bit, I wont lie. I moved on and accepted the fact that I am separate from my class now. The class I WAS in, actually. It is just hard that I went sixteen years of my life with them all, and then was torn and placed in a separate group. I got over the shock of that months ago. But now, I see all of these pictures popping up on my Facebook news feed, and I just remember last year. I got ready for Junior prom with Bridget, and I had an amazing time. Senior prom for me was hard. I knew I definitely did not belong. But I had a pretty dress with a party after. Just flashbacks make me feel a little. But like I've said so many times before, I would not trade this time here for anything.
In fact...I kind of don't want to go back there...ever. It was the hardest thing I had done in my life, walking away from my two best friends at the airport. I was completely caught off guard. I never expected it to be that difficult. Now, the clock is ticking...and I am thinking about when I have to leave my life here, with fewer chances of returning that I would like. I have friends that want to meet me at the airport here, too. But this time, I don't know how I could walk away.
I knew that this trip would not last forever, so not being able to see my friends there did not kill me. I have three best friends in New York, who make me SO proud to be there for them. I love them to death, and I knew that they would still love me too, when I came back. Here, it is much more risky. I love some people here to the point where I hurt thinking about leaving. And I know I will return here in a few years, but what are the guarantees they will remember me? None.
On a lighter note, I hope everyone has an amazing time tonight!
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